Mankind spent millenia without ever feeling the basic need to understand fellow men. All energies were devoted only to understanding the other half, but not themselves from a proper perspective. 99 per cent of misery and pain in the world would have subsided if only a tenth of this effort was diverted to understanding and helping fellow men, eventually redeeming and improving the lot of the other half as well, in a spill-over effect.
The underlying reason can perhaps be located in the way we were programmed and conditioned to think that we men are, and we alone are responsible for the upkeep and protection of the family, its material security and sexual happiness and eveything it hopes to suck us up for. It is precisely where we lost our mental balance. You have to work to keep things going. No doubt. But should this activity blind you to the extent of failure to understand the people of your own sex ? It is for upholding this heroic image, this martyr image, this macho image that we all choose to turn insensitive to our fellow men. We victimize them, brutalize them, exploit them, torture them, kill them - all for the sake of that simple smile on the face of that beloved other half. Finally it is this callousness towards your own sex that at times gets perpetuated in the case of the opposite sex too. Is it really worth it ? For all the risk taken, finally what are you left with ? Just horrible sins staring in your face at the moment of your death. Yes, those abominable sins committed for the sake of proving yourself a man enough to be admired by a woman, to keep her in good humor. You will be alone in paying for these follies.
Yes, we are all family beings. No doubt. The other half, like other members of the family, is an inseparable part of your existence. OK. She is absolutely trust-worthy and loyal. Maybe she is a well-bred, liberally educated and famous soul too. Maybe you love her like your own self, like your alter ego. Alright. But all said and done, get back to basics, come to terms with the material fact that she is just a woman, with all the frailties, insecurities and fallibilities that are inherent and integral to that God-gifted identity. Her account is often limited by her perceptions as a woman, her range of understanding of things as a woman. So, what can she present you with ? A skewed female perspective of things. It may or may not always reflect things exactly for what they are. As her man and eternal companion, you should excuse her for her limitations. But at the same time, get back to the independent, unfettered and open thinking style of the times of your pure bachelorhood, undoing the corrupting influences of married life. Reclaim your intellectual freedom as a man. Then see yourself how creative you are going to become.
How you started depending on the other half for interpreting things for you ! How you allowed yourself to be back-seat-driven by the females in your house in the matters of inter-personal relationships ! Howmany times you snapped relationships with your own brothers, friends and other near and dear people, just because this or that lady in your house deliberately painted a dirty picture of them for you ! How you fell for a calculated choice of catchy words in her narration ! You are deeply moved if her eyes glisten with tears. But how did you fail to notice the same tears in the eyes of you own father, brother and friend ! It's just that they did never speak up, they were not allowed to. Perhaps you refused to grant them at least a final audience.
But remember, any successful man of some consequence in the world wielding some degree of power and influence in the society is invariably the one who never allows his women to interfere with his relationships. It is in the nature of every member of the fair sex to try to keep her husband to herself, to monopolize him for good, to keep him under her lock and key. She does not bother to think twice of its adverse consequences. Little does she realize that such an endeavor is going to take away all male element out of him, because short of his network, he is an abject nobody. Along with him, even his kids are going to lose the benefits of their father's social network. As such, the aftermath of such female machinations will be enduring for generations, rendering them rootless. The long-term effect is invisible, but it is there.
Man ! You are not here to take sides. Mind you, you are a man, created with more social responsibility than a woman. Everyone, including outsiders, equally needs you. Not only your wife or mother or sister. This dependence on women's judgment on who to move with and who to avoid - points to your insensitivity to your fellow men.
Come on, now act your gender. While creating you as a male, God did not want you to lead a private life like a woman. You are here for many, both inside and outside the house. Be a little mindful of your fellow men, their needs, their pleasures, their pains, their goodness, their moods. Don't get lost in the world of females who are now your new-found advisors. Take a genuine, personal and active interest in the affairs of your fellow men. Watch them with your own eyes. Understand them from your own positive angle without turning to your women to add a colored caption to an obvious picture.
Be a man for you are more than just a reproductive organ !